I'm getting to the point where all of my pants still fit but I HATE all of my tops. They are all just a little to snug. This was also a little bit exciting when I thought it was the beginning of my baby bump. Then my doctor informed me that the bump will be much lower in my abdomen and that the "bump" making my clothes snug was actually the result of my not running very much anymore. He said, "I'd like to tell you otherwise, but those are just your muscles getting out of shape." HA! I think deep down I knew that. I'm going to embrace it anyway.
This leads me to the admitting that I have not, in fact, been running very often. I vasilate between total guilt and complete indulgence. It is starting to even out now. I've told myself that once the play is over at school (next weekend) I will in fact go back to my running group. I miss my friends there anyway so it will be social and good for me. The "good" news is that all of my doctors have said not to run hard, and the last doc actually said to just walk. So at least I don't have to work too hard. Wow.... lazy!!
The best thing that happend last week is that I had an ultrasound and the fetus has a face and arms and legs and does not just look like a lump of goo. Up until then I had seen the heart beat in the little blob and then I heard the heart beat, but this was the first time it actually looked like a person. At that moment, I was truly excited. I also realize I had been lying to people up until that point about being excited. I'd always say, "Yeah, we're scared but excited." No. That was not true. Up until last week I think I was saying what people wanted to hear. Because those first three months are very surreal. It was very difficult to have an emotional reaction other than WTF have we done?! But now it looks like a baby. I think it has Bill's nose. I'll let you be the judge.
So that is all for now. I will be a little better about posting things now that everyone can know about the baby.
